pinch me

My baby is now (kayin harah, poo poo poo!) 5 months old. Where did the time go? I am still stunned that I am now a mommy. My husband & I really lucked out on this precious cutie. I know that there are countless others out there whose hearts are broken by childlessness. I don't understand this curse at all. It's an injustice to have to yearn so deeply and be denied such a basic need - to procreate and love a child. Each child that is born in this world is truly a miracle. I look at my daughter's radiant face all the time and I dare to ponder her origins. At some point, G-d determined that this angel shall be placed into our arms, and breathed life into her. I am so thankful for her.

on another note.....

I am uncertain as to the future of this blog. I started it as a sounding board for mainly my dealings with infertility and the process of IVF. Since I have joined the world of motherhood, I feel somewhat in between worlds. My life is filled with the responsibilities of taking care of my little one, and no longer about yearning for her existence.

She is here.

But neither my husband nor I have forgotten how difficult it has been to get to this point. Blood, sweat and tears. Many, many tears. We are parents, but the isolating pain of being childless makes us appreciate our daughter even more. We are very protective of her. Perhaps more so than other first time parents. I doubt it, but one should not blame us if we are.

Perhaps I'll start a new blog or continue this one. I'm sure that the theme of Ten Li Koach will continue with me beyond my alter life with IVF.

Wishing all a Chag Sameach!!!!